Your favorite hometown newspaper just got its claim to fame. Well, sort of.
The Onion, the popular digital media outlet known for its satirical articles, has published a fake story targeting the Cincinnati Enquirer and subtly poking fun at the golf team at Saint Ursula Academy, a Catholic girls’ high school in East Walnut Hills.
The headline, which appeared front and center on the platform’s homepage Wednesday afternoon, reads: “Woman wastes free monthly article on Cincinnati.com with story about high school golf team.”
This fictional woman, named Margaret Cross, decided to read the article because she had a family member in the St. Ursula troop. But The Onion claims it was one of her few free articles that month.
“Because of that one thoughtless click, I can now no longer read all sorts of funny happenings in Cincinnati,” Cross said in the incorrect quote.
The newspaper said Cross “carelessly squandered her limited opportunities to access the latest news from Cincinnati.com and may now be the last of her neighbors to hear about the closing of a nearby Red Lobster or car accidents in the area.”
“Do I really have to wait a whole month to read this article about the Greater Cincinnati craft beer scene? That’s not fair! The worst part is that Parker wasn’t even mentioned in this golf article because, as it turns out, she plays for the JV team,” Cross said (but not really).
The article ended by noting that the articles Cross “most wanted to read on Cincinnati.com” were free because they were “ads served by Taboola.”
Congratulations! The Onion actually did some things right
Sure, The Onion actually got some facts right. Yes, there is a school called Saint Ursula, and yes, there is a golf team. Cincinnati is also known for its world-class breweries.
But maybe they should have done a little more thorough research.
Surprise, surprise. The facts were misrepresented
For example, the dateline of the article states that the coverage takes place in the suburb of Norwood, but the photo shows a woman on the subway.
We don’t have a working subway, folks.
Red Lobster hasn’t closed any Cincinnati locations recently either, because the Queen City loves its food. And The Onion’s X/Twitter post about the article ridiculously misspelled Cincinnati. (It’s two Ns, one T.)
The biggest flaw of all, however, is that Cincinnati.com places no limit on the number of free articles readers can access per month. The article you are reading now is free. And here, click on this one. It’s free too. So is this one and this one.
Yes, there are some premium stories behind a paywall, but much of our content is free and accessible with no daily, monthly or annual limits.
Nice try, Onion.
